Sunday marked my two week anniversary of being here. Bit of a double edged sword that. On one hand, I'm like ‘yeah I did it, I'm doing it, go me’ and on the other I'm like ‘what am I doing here, I want to go home.’
To top it off I was, yet again, made to work on my ‘day off.’ As if having three children wasn't enough, a fourth was kindly invited over so I had even more to deal with.
We went to sign me up for French classes (€669 what the actual hell?!) which I am having to pay for. I never got the chance to see what other classes they had on offer.
Generally, I was left alone. I managed to make Emma’s banana bread (you're a hero, thank you!) which we had with custard. Best thing I've eaten here by far and that's not just because I made it!
It seemed everyone had the same outfit ideas on Sunday, as 4/6 of us wore stripes. Technically, stripes are my thing as my nickname is now ‘Zebra.’
Sunday I walked around the lake with some comrades, which was hugely needed before I lost my mind!
Monday was chaos. The start of school brings VERY early mornings and whining children, two things I could live without. Everyone made it out of the door, minus one water bottle. But nobody died and there wasn't too much moaning. Turns out school isn't actually that bad when you get there, it's just the build up.
I met with a lady who gave me some advice that was very useful and gave me lots to think about.
Host mum must've had a really crappy day at work, because she promptly took it out on me when she got home. Oh the joys of living in a stranger's home where you are looked down upon. I just kind of took it, absorbing the unkind words and the anger like some emotional sponge.
I have to say, thank god for my au pair friends. They swiftly offered me listening ears, good advice and lots of support, which is always greatly appreciated.
Tuesday has been a little better. I think it'll take a while longer to acclimatise to these early morning (and not very early nights.) My food parcel from home is still ticking me over, I think that's what's keeping me sane at the moment. I took another walk ‘around’ the lake, although I didn't get very far. Instead, I sat on a bench alone and had a little cry. I cried about the host mum being horrible, I cried about being alone, I cried about missing out on all of my babies starting school, I cried because I was missing Tash’s birthday, I cried because I missed my mum and dad. I just cried a lot.
Then, I got my shit together, walked home and went above and beyond for this family. I washed their clothes, I did lots of food for dinner and I took some time to myself to collect my thoughts. I have a plan of action and a backup plan if it goes tits up.
I think I'm going to need everyone's support in staying strong and standing my ground, because I'm determined I'm going to see this journey out, bumps and all.
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